am so excited about my new house... the thot of having a home all to myself is just exhilarating... hmmm... but well, the process of getting it done up is actually quite stressful... have chosen the tiles for the living room, bedroom, kitchen and bathroom...quite different from what i had imagined tho... now i just need to choose the kitchen cabinet and all the accessories and decor...
hopefully will be able to move in mid dec... before christmas... am thankful to the Lord for giving me this place... husband and i are dedicating it to Him, for Him to use it anyway He wants to...
Ultimate satisfaction in life... that's the theme of the short movie clip that cyyam's trying to accomplish... it is an exciting project, not without its challenges and pressures though... the script spuns a story of 6 main characters in a psychology class... the module is one where they were told to do whatever they like... ooohh... sounds heavenly eh? not so if they were to write a 30, 000 word essay on it... anyway, that's not the main point of the tale...
each student is to think of what will give them the ultimate satisfaction in life and do that very thing for 30 consequetive days... the 6 main characters named their satisfactions as follows: skin-deep beauty, monetary gains, bgr, good works, weight loss and video gaming...
well, many of us know the rest don't we? that these things do not and cannot provide the ultimate satisfaction of life... they do not fill the oozing ache and emptiness that we often feel... because these are not what we are made for, these are not the purposes of life...
those who do not know God are after such... is there any difference with those who know God? or rather claim to know God? are we also not after things that do not constitute the purpose we are made for? it is a struggle indeed.. may those of us who know God find and taste the sweetness of the perfect fit, the fit of our purpose... to love Him who gave us life and in loving Him we give Him the glory!
this post is to remind me that my faithful God watches over me and have perfect plans lain out that His unsuspecting children do not know... but His plans are always good and amazing the way it all works out...
about 2 months ago, i was struggling pretty badly with a major decision. was offered a job at SGH at the neuro dept. at the same time, the offer to continue full-time in church came as well... what was i to do? how should i choose? was afraid to go against God's will... so after thinking hard for some time, i decided to choose to stay in full-time and forgo the SGH job. it was not without pangs of "ke xi", feelings and thought of what a pity it was...
nevertheless, i made the decision and started to plan ahead for next year excitedly... and then the unexpected happened which i am not at liberty to elaborate... what followed was a call back to SGH asking if the position is still available... alas! it was taken.. hmmm, but another unexpected thing happened... they offered me another job dealing with eating disorders... i was delighted... this dept is something i would opt for if i had been given a choice in the beginning. but i was not... not till the perfect timing.. My heavenly father has provided this for me and with bonus too..
What's the bonus? that i am able to begin as a part-timer first for 4 months. it's a great arrangement cos then i can have 4 months to adapt and adjust... His providence never fails!
so much has happened within a week... went back to bendemeer home ytd. sister was on leave and was at home. she took leave to rest and to take her advance theory... spent the day having lunch with siblings and helping my sister prepare for her theory test... and... she passed!!! haha, not bad, on her first try but well, the real test is the practical....
last week dad asked whether i wanna go japan with him... thot thru for a week and just when i decided to go, he told me the plans are cancelled... :( oh well, he said that we'll go LA to visit my relatives next year... hopefully it'll materialise this time...
went for a job interview at ttsh... my very first job interview! hmmm, interviewed by 3 people but thank God lah, wasn't that nervous... in the end they asked me when i can start work and i said jan... that's when their jaws dropped.. they said they cannot hold my position for 4 months and that in the course of 4 months, they might call me if anyone leaves... they also asked me when i applied so early then i said that i kiasu... haha...
oh well, pray that the Lord will teach me to learn to trust in His sovereign plans and not worry so much... for worrying"does not add a single hour to my life"... in other words, it is absolutely futile and a waste of time and strength... also if He takes care of the lilies of the fields and the birds of the air, He will surely take care of me!
To update from my previous post, God has finally enabled me to settle what i didn't want to.. and the taste of victory is sweet indeed...
i received a reali weird email today... at first, i received an sms telling me that i've been slected for an interview and asked me to check my email.. and so i did... the more i read the mail, the more suspicious i became... the company's name was not mentioned and it was supposedly an international company... and guess what they were looking for? social workers... international company looking for social workers? and the job scope? the social workers needed to travel to other countries, meet up with other people and their expenses will all be paid... they'll stay in 4 star hotels while they're abroad and they'll be paid US dolloars... where is the interview? not fixed and there's a whole range of timings that you can choose from to go for the interview... we're supposed to state our choices... hmmm, do not know what kind of scam this will be...
it is tiring to face many temptations everyday... at times you feel like giving up the fight... An example? an immediate thought came to mind after reading Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong's National Day speech... i turned to my husband and said "hey, let's migrate!"... years ago, the very same me said i would never migrate... i am the sort of person who starts feeling pangs of home sickness just minutes away from home... ok, maybe not that bad but hours would be a reasonable gauge...
why migrate you say... his speech left me thinking that me and my children are going to suffer, what with the foreign talents coming in and all... bad enough competition without them... of course, seriously tempted but the unavoidable question then surfaces... what does God say? what is God's will? the all-encompassing question, the all-protecting question, the question of most concern... its hard isn't it? especially when His clashes with yours...
oh well, this isn' t the temptation of overwhelming concern, of whether to migrate or not... the overwhelming one is whether to choose to obey God... in all issues... i am tempted, very tempted to let certain issues pass. not think about it, handle it the way i want to... all the time deep inside knowing that i'll regret it if i dont choose God's way...
o let me feel Thee near me! the world is ever near
i see the sights that dazzle, the tempting sounds i hear
my foes are ever near me around me and within
but Jesus draw Thou nearer and shield my soul from sin
o let me hear Thee speaking in accents clear and still
above the storms of passion the murmurs of self-will
o speak to reassure me to hasten or control
o speak and make me listen Thou Guardian of my soul
never thot i'll have a blog... not until the day dear waiyee sat down beside me and said "i'll create a blog for you", laid hold of my mouse and started clicking away (and i haven't even responded i think)... and here we are, my blog.
apprenhensive at first.. i had thots such as "what's a 30 year old doing w a blog?" but oh well, even the president of Iran has one... not too old to possess one then...
despite the lighthearted start to this, it is not descriptive of thots and feelings at hand... various multiple issues to be dealt with. issues to do with anger, bitterness and a critical spirit... issues to do with worries and anxiety. the search for a house has finally come to an end... am not elated tho.. ain't i hard to please. fulfillment of my longing and yet am not above the world... reason? a sudden realization of a big responsibility. not that i didn't know better before. just that things doesn't seem to dawn fully upon you til it is fulfilled. exactly what's happening to me now... nevertheless, am thankful to the Lord for giving us this house...
other cause of concern... my job. contract ends this year... came across an area of interst while searching. Beyond Social Services has a program called "Babes".. no, it does not deal with pigs, pork, pretty girls or the like.. it is so called becos it is a program for teenage unwed mothers and unwanted babies.. a heart breaking job actually. am gonna find out more...
tho these cloud my mind at times, there're still many things to thank God for... mon was a good time with dad and mom with vinc... had a good talk with yanheng ytd... vinc managed to have a change of perspective about job, God teaching him to be faithful in small matters...
God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him
Tuesday, November 21, 2006